Notes from Hawai’i Kai

Hawai’i Kai

The latest visit with moms was neither comforting or reassuring. Moms is locked into a slow mental and physical decline, further exacerbated by the Draconian measures mandated by the sister-in-law. In fact, the bro’s entire family is culpable. In the guise of protecting moms from potentially dangerous falls, a literal prison has been constructed. Of course, anything can happen anytime. Moms could succumb suddenly to a heart attack or a bout of pneumonia, both common causes of senior citizen fatalities.

Moms short-term memory appeared to have improved since the last visit. However, there is some doubt that moms can even recall the approximate point in time of that visit. Moms seems to have a vague recollection of receiving the greeting card that was dispatched a month ago. For all intents and purposes, the general assessment is that moms can no longer effectively reference time.

The prison-like living conditions have finally succeeded in breaking moms’ independence. Statements repeated constantly by moms are simply a parroting of the rules dictated by the sister-in-law. There was no mention of the controlling nature of the sister-in-law. Rather, a more passive and accepting stance was evident.

The 24-year-old retired nephew actually exited his room (a rare event) to monitor the visit with moms, no doubt a mandate from the sister-in-law. The nephew treats moms like a small child, much like the bro and sister-in-law. Observing that kind of behavior proved to be extremely repugnant. However, no remedy is possible because the situation is out of the personal locus of control.

In the end, a difficult decision must be made. First off, the Enterprise® CarShare membership will be terminated before the fee for the new fiscal year is charged. Subsequent visits, if any, will be accomplished by public transportation (i.e., bus). The journey by bus to Hawai’i Kai from town is about an hour. The nearest bus stop is about a half-mile away, which will most likely act as a deterrent for visits of any frequency. In other words, there will be a rapid distancing from all immediate family. The rationale (with high probability) is that moms probably would not even notice.

Addendum: The previous observation found moms partaking of junk food and carbonated soft drinks, both adamantly avoided by moms in the past. The latest observation? Moms now watches the widescreen tube, another activity never pursued by moms prior. Clearly, moms has completely assimilated the life-style of the bro’s family.